The Single Question

So earlier in the day I was hanging out with my friend. We are both currently single and have been single for over a year. We were talking about our most recent crushes, or lack thereof, and the kind of talk that involves a teenage boy mind mostly revolving around girls. Or the lack of them. There was a strain of thought that constantly ran through my mind - "I just want someone to want me." Sounds familiar? I guess it runs on almost every straight, single person's mind.

It sounds pathetic doesn't it? It's not that I don't have any self-esteem. I am content with my looks, personality, intelligence, success, etc. yet when I'm alone in my own moments, I still long to go for quiet walks with that person, or share ice creams together, or have endless talks on the phone, or just to know that someone else out there is thinking of me before they go to sleep.

Why do you think it is that we feel the need to be needed by the opposite sex so badly? Do you think it is true that people in relationships are generally happier than single people because of this reason?

Gratitude

Rainbows are flying into my space

I am happy and try not to go to waste

My ramblings quite seem mindless

Yet tickles everyone's senses

Well I guess it just suggests what happiness is...

The butterflies they flew away

Like the fashion from yesterday

Ice creams now taste so yum

Love the story that I've now become

And its cool to be done than undone

Just as long as you enjoy the fun...

I've been eating my fruits and my greens

And there's no need no need for any medicines

To fly and to be naturally high

You first need to learn to flirt with the sky

And just try till it sides to shine the light on your mind

Just be kind to let it find you....

Thank you my little friend

You and I both know I'll never change

I've been on a break to make my ways to mend

And thank you my little friend

Thank you my dear friend

A Letter For A Difficult Friend

Dearest friend,

I know our relationship has been difficult and we haven't really spoken in a long time, but it's recently become clear that we'll be seeing a lot of each other in the next few months. The issues we've faced in the past are going to resurface and we really, really need to work this out now before it's too late.

I'll admit I've said some terrible things about you in the past. I apologize. You think of me as an unintelligent person for not understanding you, even after years of trying. That's not true. You're difficult, you know? I know I've given up on you in the past and even broke your trust by cheating, but never again. I'm not going to give up on you this time. I'm determined to understand. I'm determined to keep trying.

That said, I hope things are easier this time around. I hope everything sinks in easier. I promise to keep trying despite how difficult you are. And you really are. Don't deny it and I'll try to keep my "hate" claims under wraps this semester.

Maths, I do want to be your friend. Really. Just help me understand you. Please.

Regards,

Jeet

Life Comes Around

Is it a chance to get lucky? Or is it lucky to get something by chance? What’s the difference, if at all there is any? To what extent is it really feasible, to let the universe take on the role of your personal manager and trust in its ability to get you what you want? Does it justify your wait, no matter how long it is?

I believe time is one big adventure. And a big misadventure too. For what may seem like the best option at one point of time, may not necessarily be the best at another. Or at least that’s what I think. Maybe, for time to work in favour of you, all you need to do is stop thinking! Let time take you through whichever route it wants to. But what if time is waiting for directions from you? Maybe it wants you to make your own course? Deceiving? A little maybe.

Time is a tricky little obsession! Everyone has it.

“Hari, submit your work on time!”

“Guys, it’s time for dinner.”

Hell, even the next person we pass on the road will probably end up asking – “What is the time?”

The thing is, I don’t know! It keeps on changing! What if it’s just a matter of convenience? An imaginary clog in the wheel, that keeps everything in momentum.

Maybe life is a wheel. It goes exploring new ideas and adventures and when it’s done a full circle, it shows us pretty much the same things it showed us earlier. Only this time, it’s got something else sticking to it.

Guess life repeats itself. Just with different settings and characters.

Tin Tin Ti Din !

Life takes place as we live it. Maybe that's why everyone's life is so unique and different. I am 20 and damn! This age is confusing! Sometimes, I am in a black and white and the next moment, I am in a thriller! And isnt it ironical that no matter where you are, you always want to be on the other side?

I think you grow when you learn to accept some things and believe in your decisions for the best. There will be moments when you get off on the wrong side of the bed, burn your toast, get stuck in traffic all day and get an F in your paper. But in the end, life's much bigger than that.

When was the last time we simply forgot all our worries and had an awfull lot of pani puris and bhel puri instead? When was the last time we looked up at the sky. I mean REALLY look up at the sky. Not the oh-god!-why-does-it-always-happen-to-me look up at the sky. I mean look up at the sky and be wondering how the clouds are however and whatever shape they are in? Who made those shapes? (I meant curves) When was the last time we let out our best carefree and satisfied burp?. Or quite simply - when was the last time we simply allowed everything else around us to slow down and give ourselves a much deserved moment?

Yes! We do have the power to slow down everything around us. And no. I dont mean using some molecular accelerator that increases your molecular activity. We can do all this using just our mind!

Sure! Who hasnt had their first awesome love experience? And again, who hasnt had their first awfull breakup? Who has not been embarassed by thier zips left open? Or their public farts? These things are bound to happen. They are all written in life's recipe. Instead of wondering what went wrong, just turn the page and voila! You have a new start! Its as simple as that! Maybe its also a little complicated. But its easy. Confused? Well I am. I guess blame it on the age.

I recently had a wonderful experience. And it will be one the best things I ever felt. I still feel it. And maybe sometimes you dont get the cherry. But you still have the cake! And sometimes, its the best thing that you ended up with just the cake!

Hmm...I have no idea what I wanted to say. Maybe I'll try out some new things tomorrow. Maybe I'll go bald! Or...umm...maybe I'll just wear a hat. Or learn to dance! Or find the solution to pi ! Or maybe I'll just get a breezer. After all - life tastes best when its chilled!

Innocence

Finally managed to upload another song I had composed. Let me know what you think :)

www.myspace.com/jeetspage

Favourtite White Tshirt

One thing I absolutely love about the rains is having a steaming cup of tea, along with a platefull of the most delicious and the most unhealthy pakodas I can get my hands on (:

And one thing I absolutely hate about the rains, is the massive amount of mud sprays you get on yourself, while riding your bike. There's absolutely no way you can escape it. Trying to avoid it is like going to China and trying to avoid Chineese food (although the latter sometimes taste better than mud).

I have noticed that this happens to me specially when I am wearing white. More so on the days, when I happen to leave behind my jacket at home.

So, on a day like any other, I was on my way to college on my bike. The weather was pretty good.

"Hmmm....thats weird.", I said to myself.

"The weather is never this good."

In fact, it was so good that it somehow didnt seem right to be so good in the middle of the rainy season! And sure enough! It starts to rain the very next moment! And no! It wasnt the kind of rain that you would pass on for a tiny leak. No! The whole dam had collapsed!!! And it was coming down hard!

I was wearing a newly washed white t-shirt, and quite obviously, I forgot my jacket at home. The vehicles on the road had no intention of sparing me or my newly washed white tshirt at all! One particular lady, who was driving her Honda, seemed to make it a point to splash water and mud on every rider she passed. She was too good at it.

By the time I reached college, my t-shirt looked like it had been dipped in chocolate. I was even tempted to taste it. But thank goodness for self control!

Fortunately my friend, my very good friend, Shane, happened to have an extra tshirt with him that day.

Yay!!

It was white.

Crap!

It was his favourite white tshirt.

Crap!! Crap!!

Somehow I managed to convince him that his favourite white tshirt is absolutely safe with me and I wont let any mud sprays come on it.

He agreed.

He shouldnt have. Cause the very next moment, and I mean in the very next couple of minutes we decided to go and have lunch. And of course! You are allowed to guess what happened next.

The look that Shane had on his face, when he saw that his favourite white tshirt, now had a patch of brown (thanks to chicken gravy and my clumsy hands) still gives me nightmares! It was the scariest look I ever got from him!

Now this episode of my life has taught me one very valuable lesson.

Never borrow a white tshirt from your friend on a rainy day. Especially his favourite white tshirt. Thankfully things are back to normal now. We greet each other. We talk about girls together. He acts gay with me. I play along. Yeah....pretty much the life of a normal 20 year old, sleeping in class NOT wearing a white tshirt. Anymore.

It still rains though.

26 Letters

And lately I've been writing lines, sometimes hollow sometimes full
But mostly about you and I, the lovesick fool.
Candid moments, of sound and sights
Dinner and Jazz by the mystique seaside.
Every little touch, and all your subtle moves,
Find the right words, and I'll tell you when I do.
Gotta keep the distance though
How hard is it? I sure would know.
In the oceans I sailed, had no choice but to leave
Just when I found that my love was just as deep.
Kissing you would be the deepest thing to do
Loving you was like cupid right on cue.
My head is in so many places, and so are you
Now tell me, how do I settle this without you?
Only if instead of you, I could love someone else
Probably she'd be betrayed,cause I cant love anyone but yourself.
Quiet nights and sparky spring days
Reminiscent of the wastefull times, all so gone without a trace.
Soul has a meaning of its own as long as it lasts
They had mine with you, no wonder I miss you the most.
Useless questions sometimes scare me a little
Vow to you, if I could I would never leave you in the middle.
Words might be forgotten, and so i write this
eXaggerated it might sound, but you are the pages of my diaries.
You know I would do anything if I could get you, but like the
Zephyr, I guess I'll move away, ever so gently from you.

Bittersweet Symphony

Who is a best friend? What is a best friend made of?

When I was young, a best friend for me was probably someone, who I was very fond of and would share his/her lunch with me at school. When I was younger, my best friends were Captain Planet and Swat Kats. Maybe, it still holds true for some of us.

Throughout the year, loads of short messages do the rounds on our phones, highlighting some aspect of friendship or the other. Some are nice, some are flattering, some are naive and some are stupid and downright hilarious. They all seem to point out that friendship is the best thing going for the insecure psyche.

However, a best friend is hard to find, difficult to identify and tough to hold on to. They cannot be pointed out. They are like the moonlight. They are there during the bright times, silent and diluted, but ever present with you, but also shining their light in the dark times. And no amount of analysis can help you ever comprehend, what a best friend really is, until you get one. They are someone who can do what others wont even dream of doing for you. If on one hand it means standing by you when the whole world has turned its back on you, on the other hand, it means forcing you to give up your bad ways even if he or she knows that you may not see reason in it and take it otherwise.

One of the other things about best friends is, when they get hurt, whether it was because of you or someone/something else, you get hurt equally bad.

I think I was enormously stupid and unexplainably juvenile, to even have second thoughts about the idea of my best friend doing something wrong to me, just because someone else told me so. I mean she was my first real best friend. She still is. It took me two and half years to finally meet her. It took her even lesser to change me into someone desirable and definitely a much better human.

It hurt me a lot, to know that I was a part to the play that brought tears to her eyes. It was probably lesser than what she had to go through to wipe them. Especially for a person like her who has never cried before.

To her :

There is no way I can explain to you how sorry I am about what happened. I really am out of words.

The fact is, every other person, hears what I have to say. My friends listen to what I say. But you, know what I dont even say. And for that and everything else, you are my best friend in every sense of its own. I hope I can be one to you too. I know lost faith, even if it is little, is hard to get back, but I am truly sorry about everything.

All I want you to know is that if ever you are stranded in the middle of a desert, you can call on me and be sure that I will come and pick you up. Everytime you need me to.

Long Distance Relationship

Seven colours of the rainbow

A friend to every blind soul

Brown trees outside of the window

Dancing under the light's own shadow

I have a secret but I wont surrender

To live out and to live in the wander

Its both disturbing and relieving

Like a word with a nasty double meaning

Crisp as the throws of the morning

I light my path and follow my own calling

Set your foot on the unknown ground

Distance doesnt tell the truth, I found

Its a chance to share your dreams

Chance the mirror and get real with your feelings

Should the winter call where would you hide?

Take a minute off time when you decide

P.S.: I have nothing against the idea of long distance. One of my friends had a break up because of the distance and so this poem is, in a way, just one of the many arguments that bothered my mind for a period.

Uh Oh !

So I got tagged. And now, I have to list Seven Weird Facts about me. Bhaalu, if you're reading this, I am pret-ty sure you are getting a kick out of this, aren't you?

Anyway...here goes...

1. I rub my tummy whenever I talk. Or stand. Or sit. Pretty much anytime. (not in a sick way though)

2. Sometimes I prefer feminine stuff more than guy stuff. Guy stuff gets boring after a while. No, I dont have a secret make-up kit in my cupboard. (anymore)

3. I like bursting bubbles from bubble wrap. (:

4. Sometimes, I like to scratch my back with a comb. It gives me great pleasure.

5. I am still the kid who wakes up in the middle of the night to grab his midnight snack. I love midnight snacks !! They are awesome !! (:

6. Only the original Sony Ericsson earphones fit into my ears. The others dont fit me. I have weird ears.

7. I can burp the alphabets. I am not too proud of it but its talent!

There you go! Seven of the weirdest about me! Hehe...

Thanks Shweta! (:

On This Day

3rd July 2009.

On this day I -

1. Woke up at 6 AM.

2. Wore orange shorts with white coconut trees.

3. Started recording one of the bands originals.

4. Had a ton of cheese.

5. Fell asleep while recording.

6. Ordered two cheese burst pizzas from Domino's. They took more than 30 minutes. Got 300 bucks off. ((:

7. Went for a late night walk with Sunai at 1 30 in the morning. Not romantic.

8. Got chased by dogs. Thrice.

If you are wondering why I am posting the events of 3rd July today, on the 18th of July, its because I was quite busy with a lot of things that needed my immediate attention. Or I was just too lazy.

Coffee Shop Smile

Coffee shops are great

On a sunny winter day.

To read a book and smile

With the wind just as mild.

The wooden shades talk

Of birds of a flock.

About the lonely sky

And the rainbows and butterfly.

There are fish in the river

Who talk about diamonds in the silver.

Like the way we show us love

They too believe in the white dove.

There's always a reason to sing

When you least expect, it rings

Maybe its a little out of place

But in the end its you and your days

Maybe what we see are visions

Rainbows too are just illusions.

When you learn how to fly

Remember, dont yet say a goodbye.

A secret garden on the hill

Gives you fruits but without the bill.

But again secrets are for everyone

Some have fun, and some decide to learn.

They say love is a mystery

Like an unfound cherry.

You have to fall stumble and hurry

And then you find your chocolate bunny.

There's always a reason to sing

When you least expect, it rings

Maybe its a little out of place

But in the end its you and your days.

Statutory Warning : Includes The Word "Fart"

Let me tell you about a funny thing that happened to me yesterday. But in order to understand how humiliaitingly funny it was, you will need to know a couple of things. Read on.

Now I would like to believe there are two kinds of people in this world. One - People who dont really mind when someone farts in public. And two - the other kind who would take so much offense that if it was possible for them to go to a police station and file a complaint against that person, he/she would not only do that, but also make sure they get the strictest punishment that one can get for farting in public. Like the warning to eat less spicy food wasnt enough.

Flatulence, (the scientific word for fart) (yes I looked it up) is the only natural way of releasing gases that are byproducts of the digestion process. In fact, times are so bad now for pro-public farters, that one man was actually accused for accidently farting when an officer pulled him over. Of course the charges were dropped after the judge said he was innocent and the fart was only accidental.

But some people's farts are so precious, they even find their way to online super markets like ebay. Only a couple of days back, a "jar of fart" from a "hot girl" was on sale on ebay for $71. I think "cool guy" bought it.

There have been quite a lot of inventions to silence the sound that comes along when one farts. Some genius guy called "Big chicken mushroom" from Wuhun, China, invented a device not so handy and completely impractical with a highly creative and original name, called the "Fart Silencer". Genius I say.

I dont understand the big deal that some people associate with farts. Its a completely natural phenomena! After it has occured, it leaves one with a sense of lightedness and relief with a tone of satisfaction that is comparable to a good night of you know what I am talking about....

sex in case you cant figure it out. Now there are scientists who actually "grow diamonds" using methane and oxygen which is nothing more than crystallized farts! And they say diamonds are a girl's best friend eh?

So anyway I think its time for me to tell you the truth. Well nothing humiliatingly funny happened to me yesterday. Atleast nothing that I know of. I just wrote that so you would be interested and hence read the rest of the story. Haha. Gotcha!

I should really get a life.

My Second Instrumental song I composed

Its called Moonlight...please do comment...


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7vrePIbfDEg

My Holidays. (Cheesy title. I know.)

Holidays! The sheer mention of it brings a smile, as broad as the equator! Doesn't it ?? They are the greatest thing since hoverboards. Oh Wait! They havent been invented yet. But they are great anyway.
Everyone plans to do something unusual and exciting in their holidays. Some plan to go skiing. Some plan to go scuba diving. Some plan to learn cooking. And some of us, the highly motivated ones, learn the art of warming the couch and letting the mind wander away into a distant fantasy land, ruled by the likes of Tom Cruise and Jim Carrey and Jennifer Aniston and Tom and Jerry, while the remote takes control. Its almost like meditation I tell you.

I come from a college where 95 % of my friends are from out of town. So naturally they crave to go back home during the holidays and when they do go back home, I am left all alone. So all the guys, with whom I would normally do all the.......well...."normal" stuff, leave me at this time of the year and I have to do it all by myself. (Are you thinking what I think you are thinking? You perv!)

Anyway, this time, I have promised to not let these holidays go to waste and instead, make a detailed plan and sketch out exactly what I will be doing during the holidays, and how I will be spending my time doing more productive work and use my free time more effectively and wisely.

Right. Its been 3 days and I havent even got a pen. (I prefer black.) (I don't know why I said that) (I think I am in love with the brackets "( )") (Sorry)

But I plan to keep you updated everyday with all the new things that I (will hopefully) learn, all the new stuff that I (will hopefully) do, all the new books that I will (hopefully) read and all the new places that I (will hopefully) travel to, during my holidays. I will try and refrain from getting any fatter. I will try to move my legs and arms and use them to do something other than push buttons on the remote and walk from the couch to the fridge and back. Sleeping in the afternoon for 4 hours is a total waste of time and I will try to not do it. At least try to not do it with my mouth open. Hopefully, some hot girl will drive down to my place in her brand new BMW, just to keep me motivated enough to not do the above mentioned stuff. Why would she drive down to my place?? Just! And maybe if I manage to do it right, we can go all south....for a drive in her car of course! (Perv!)

So its 1:15 AM. I think I'll sign off. Got a big day tomorrow. (not really). Loads of stuff to do. (not really). Got to wake up early and go jogging. (not really). So cya!

(really)

This Is Not A Poem

I did not do my laundry last week.
I did not clean my bike yet.
I havent fixed my guitar till now.
I havent got a haircut either.

I havent paid my phone bills and I havent cleaned the dishes.
I havent seen Lord of The Rings and
I havent yet changed the month on the calendar.

I havent told my friend how much I love her.
I havent paid attention in class either.
I havent tried to try as yet.

I havent shaved lately.
I havent studied much either.
I havent stopped wasting too much time and
I definitely havent started using all of it.

I didnt make my bed yesterday.
I havent completely kept in touch with all my friends.

I didnt do this.
I didnt do that.
I havent come here and
I havent gone there either.

But yesterday,
I did vote.

And I am proud to have done it.
Have you ?

Brain Flush #1

Strange.
Sometimes you can't hold on only because you can't let go.

Tennis Vs Pacman

I am bored, jobless and my bank account balance is nearly zero. I dont even have the money to buy shaving cream. Therefore now, I have fur growing on my face. Also, my super detergent washing powder is over. Which means I am officially out of clean clothes to wear for another couple of days. I still have my guitar though. Oh wait! My strings broken. Gaah...!!
Doesn't matter. I still have my orange juice.

So I was just browsing through the 2764757463547582576 different channels on my TV and I just came to know that world number two tennis player, Roger Federer, married his long term girlfriend, Mirka Vavrinec. Interesting eh? No? Okay.

Tennis is a funny game. It is unlike pacman you see. You cant play tennis while sitting on your couch. Or pause it to go and have a leak. Not real tennis anyway.

So I tried my hand at tennis a couple of days ago. Sure! You just have to hit the ball across the net and thats it, right? Well basically...yeah. But getting the ball across itself was a task as difficult as losing weight! For me anyway.
Heck! They even have a proper technique to holding the tennis ball! You dont just hold the ball and the racquet like how you think you would hold the ball and the racquet. Sometimes, if you are an absolute beginner and a person who absolutely loves to exaggerate things a lot, like me, there's a little rocket science involved too!

This is how you do it. Hold the tennis ball with your non-dexterous hand. This will enable you to hold the racket in your dominant hand, and be ready to hit the ball to your opponent. Now, when the ball is coming towards you, watch the flight of the ball very carefully. Make a mental note of the angle and the speed of the ball and use your high school geometry and algebra and physics to calculate the position of the ball, as to where it will be, after it has bounced and after it has stopped rising. Accordingly move to that position. Reading the flight path of the ball is vital to move to the right place. Otherwise you will miss the shot.

In Pacman, you just have to move the joystick in four different directions.

After my hugely successful round of playing tennis against my friend, in a real court, using a real net, I was promoted to play against the wall.

Yes. The wall !!



For those of you who don't know much about tennis, like me, the wall is a terrible opponent and let me tell you this - He is the best! No matter how good a player you are, he will always be better! I mean, he never gets tired. He will always return your shots. He is never at fault. He never talks. And he doesnt even get distracted by beautiful women. Or men. (I don't think he has feelings)

So naturally, I was a little frustrated with my friend for making me play against someone who doesnt even talk! I mean, who will I talk to in the middle of shots now? Instead, its just making me concentrate on my shots better! Its making me CONCENTRATE !! I can't even distract "the wall" with my funny antics! It doesnt even give me chance to do that! The other day, I was telling him a knock knock joke and I didn't even get to tell him who was on the other side of the door! He just stared blankly!

But all said and done, I can't deny the fact that I somehow still like tennis. Some of the outfits for girls are really cute! I mean REALLY cute!! :)
Besides that I kinda like hitting the balls. Everytime I hit it, with my racket of course, I get this weird pleasure of having really accomplished something! You should try it out too! With a racket of course.

But I'd still prefer to sip on a glass of orange juice, while I settle down on the couch in my non-clean clothes and unshaven face to play the best game ever - Pacman.



Anyday.

Improbable....But I Love Her Anyway

Ok. I know. Sometime back I must have said that I will never ever fall in love again and that no matter what, I will leave things to fate and destiny or something equally stupid like that. Well now, I would like to change my views a little.

Love is something that cannot be stopped at will. Or even be started at will. It doesn't have an on/off switch, which can be turned on/off at will. Scientifically, love is nothing but the chemical release of endorphines. But humanly, love is a tool......and more love is the end product.

I am still in love with her and more so than ever. She probably doesn't know this and maybe its better like that. Who knows? Who knows how she might react if I tell her that I love her so much that I would happily gift her my last chocolate? She obviously knows that chocolate to me, is what Adam is to Eve. Or worse still! How will she react when she comes to know that the more I see her, the more I feel like kissing that imperfectly cute nose of her's. The more I talk to her, the more I want to be lost with her. The more I look into her eyes, the harder it is for me to stop myself from kissing her, from not touching her lips. The harder it is for me to tell her just how much I love her.

If I were him, I would begin by looking into your eyes as I gently brush away your hair with my fingertips. As I look deep into your heart, I would run my fingers down your cheek and bring my index finger to your lips. I would ask you to close your eyes and feel the summer breeze rushing upon your skin. I would kiss you as I lower my hands into yours and our fingers will interlock as the scattered noises of the crowd and the surroundings drown into this moment of us. Thats what I would have done anyway. But all I have is just a handful of words to let you know what you mean to me.

I have learnt, that loving her, is a journey of finding her heart through the simplest ways. Her eyes, her lips and her touch, they are all just extensions of her inner beauty. Usually, the way a woman desires for her man to change, is considered a flaw, since its always upto the man whether he wants to change or not and acceptance is a significant part of love. However, when you take the time to discover her for everything that she is and find her intentions, its about letting her change you into the man you were always meant to be and allowing yourself to need her in order to become more than who you are.

You are someone with whom I can share all my deepest feelings and dreams with. It is my desire to make you laugh and cry and dream of many more beautiful things. You are the reason I find a new reason to redefine the redefinition of what it is to love.

Loving her has been a journey of realization. Realization of the many beautiful truths and candid moments, that would have otherwise gone unnoticed if it weren't for her. It is a journey of discovery. And finding beauty in her every movement. Like when she runs her fingertips along the empty walls of a lonely hallway. Or the time when she simply cups the palm of her small hands to cover her face as she sneezes. Or sometimes even when she is just sleeping. Doing nothing, yet simply doing everything. Her eyes closed, breathing gently, her soft cheeks resting without a doubt on her hands, while her playful mind wanders far far away, dreaming in another land.

But I have also learnt that sometimes the only thing that matters is just being there for her as best as you're able to, which is the reason why its the desire you have to build a connection with her and put yourself in her shoes. I want to make love with her. Not just to her. And there's a difference.

Loving you, as I discovered, is to give you the wings and still hope that you might stay. Loving you is to realize that your tears are not just tears, but beautiful heart cries instead. Loving you is to let you know that even though my eyes are closed and I am senseless to my surroundings, I am always awake for you. It is to let you know that I'll always wait for you.
I still love you.