Improbable....But I Love Her Anyway

Ok. I know. Sometime back I must have said that I will never ever fall in love again and that no matter what, I will leave things to fate and destiny or something equally stupid like that. Well now, I would like to change my views a little.

Love is something that cannot be stopped at will. Or even be started at will. It doesn't have an on/off switch, which can be turned on/off at will. Scientifically, love is nothing but the chemical release of endorphines. But humanly, love is a tool......and more love is the end product.

I am still in love with her and more so than ever. She probably doesn't know this and maybe its better like that. Who knows? Who knows how she might react if I tell her that I love her so much that I would happily gift her my last chocolate? She obviously knows that chocolate to me, is what Adam is to Eve. Or worse still! How will she react when she comes to know that the more I see her, the more I feel like kissing that imperfectly cute nose of her's. The more I talk to her, the more I want to be lost with her. The more I look into her eyes, the harder it is for me to stop myself from kissing her, from not touching her lips. The harder it is for me to tell her just how much I love her.

If I were him, I would begin by looking into your eyes as I gently brush away your hair with my fingertips. As I look deep into your heart, I would run my fingers down your cheek and bring my index finger to your lips. I would ask you to close your eyes and feel the summer breeze rushing upon your skin. I would kiss you as I lower my hands into yours and our fingers will interlock as the scattered noises of the crowd and the surroundings drown into this moment of us. Thats what I would have done anyway. But all I have is just a handful of words to let you know what you mean to me.

I have learnt, that loving her, is a journey of finding her heart through the simplest ways. Her eyes, her lips and her touch, they are all just extensions of her inner beauty. Usually, the way a woman desires for her man to change, is considered a flaw, since its always upto the man whether he wants to change or not and acceptance is a significant part of love. However, when you take the time to discover her for everything that she is and find her intentions, its about letting her change you into the man you were always meant to be and allowing yourself to need her in order to become more than who you are.

You are someone with whom I can share all my deepest feelings and dreams with. It is my desire to make you laugh and cry and dream of many more beautiful things. You are the reason I find a new reason to redefine the redefinition of what it is to love.

Loving her has been a journey of realization. Realization of the many beautiful truths and candid moments, that would have otherwise gone unnoticed if it weren't for her. It is a journey of discovery. And finding beauty in her every movement. Like when she runs her fingertips along the empty walls of a lonely hallway. Or the time when she simply cups the palm of her small hands to cover her face as she sneezes. Or sometimes even when she is just sleeping. Doing nothing, yet simply doing everything. Her eyes closed, breathing gently, her soft cheeks resting without a doubt on her hands, while her playful mind wanders far far away, dreaming in another land.

But I have also learnt that sometimes the only thing that matters is just being there for her as best as you're able to, which is the reason why its the desire you have to build a connection with her and put yourself in her shoes. I want to make love with her. Not just to her. And there's a difference.

Loving you, as I discovered, is to give you the wings and still hope that you might stay. Loving you is to realize that your tears are not just tears, but beautiful heart cries instead. Loving you is to let you know that even though my eyes are closed and I am senseless to my surroundings, I am always awake for you. It is to let you know that I'll always wait for you.
I still love you.